Last evening at albb, for the first time in over two years, I gave survey presentation of my work. Days prior, I went through old directories and dv tapes scrounging for higher resolution images. I found many things I had thought long lost (particularly in DV) and could not for the life of me find recent things I knew I had.
Yesterday's presentation covered a span of nearly 7 years of work beginning with my days as an art student until now. I arranged the work mostly through form: Art Performance, Installation Art, Art Interventions, Media Art and Video, Painting and Photography, and Shared Learning (teaching positions, lectures, grants and alternative/group/community projects). I rushed through the presentation and was told that I wasn't loud enough. I hate doing these things on PowerPoint (in spite of having discovered how to extend the desktop so as to simultaneously present the slideshow through the projector and the presenation file itself on the laptop screen).
THE EUNICH
I realized that much of the rawness and experimental power that used to exist in my work is now missing. It's not only about getting naked (for those of you at the presentation); its about the way I feel about doing things now. Apparently in a trade-off, the physical or emotional qualities that used to identify my work have increasingly been replaced by intellectual vapor. Connecting my work to issues without rechanneling the energy back into the body has left my work souless. People would "hmm" and "ah, i see" rather than "damn!" To be honest, I don't really enjoy this transformation, which was apparent to me after the talk. I want to get down. I want to howl and destroy things again. I want to perform like an epileptic with tourette syndrome on crack, again. Now, I just feel like art pussy. Some changes are in order. Time to grow some.
More Info
Blog. Motoko Uda
Posted by on March 31, 2006 3:07 PM | Permalink
Rich,
je suis bien malheureuse d'avoir un anglais aussi déplorable car je n'ai sans doute pas tout bien compris de ta présentation ce soir-là et de ce que tu écris aujourd'hui sur ton blog. Je n'ai pas dit «Damn!», ni «Oh, I see!», j'ai juste pleuré en voyant certaine de tes performances. Mais je ne sais pas vraiment ce que cela veut dire. La violence me touche ou elle me fait peur... Je crois qu'elle me fait peur... Que veux-tu détruire Rich, est-ce toi ? Ce n'est pas si facile à partager...
Anna,
Merci de votre réponse. Le poteau d'hier a été écrit plutôt rapidement. Je me sens que mon travail a changé, et j'en manque la qualité expérimentale de l'art. Je me sens qu'une partie de cela a été maintenant perdue aux concepts et aux idées. Je suis intéressé de voir si les choses changent. Merci beaucoup!
Rich
it was important to give this talk, it's always, and you did it // for sur it was not easy, maybe you should consider it like a performance itself cause it hurts and let marks /// maybe the confusion is coming from the fact you wanted to show and to explain too much and at the end it's hard to link eveything for the understanding, but mainly 2 directions appeared, one is violent and dark, but certainly too personnal and the other one is poetic romantic and sweet, like missed connections or your recent paintings, fresh and pop.. one is hurting and the other pleasing... ///..go to where you feel better and confortable with /// friendly >>>
Rich..
thanks for the post... so know what you mean....
perhaps there can be a mix of intellect and vigor/passion.. the 'damn'! in the kinetic energy of the body in your art...
Ironically... have you read Artaud's work.. and Deleuze and Guattari's essys in "A thousand Plateaus"... especially "Becoming a Body without Organs" and "Becoming Animal"... basically about how humans as forces could kinetically change ourselves and the world around us...
( of course i am saying it simplistically:))..
also a new book that just came out that describes a little of what you feel,, and how to view it differently...Andre Lepecki's "Exhausting Dance,,,, Performance and Politics of movment"..
Hope all is well with you.. i will be moving to southern california come fall... where i will be doing research on the contemporary performance and arts scene in 'new' asia... i hope you will consent later down the road to be one of the representatives of that movment?
ps.. meet up soon one day ok?
melissa
Hi Rich,
I popped on to your blog site today because it was interesting to chat with you with george last night, and it reminded me about having enjoyed your talk last week...so I thought I would check it out on your site.. and now I am writing a comment, which is the first time I have ever done so on a blog site! Just wanted to say, I didn't take souless, intellectual vapor, or art pussy out... I did get a sense of chapters ending and new growth emerging, and also the sense of a soul stretching in to all its corners- pain, joy, deep, shallow, etc... I found it refreshing and real, and the contrasts made all of your work more accessible- I personally need art that provokes both ah's and damns; and am provoked by both tourettists and cow-eyed manga girls! I also think doing presentations makes one overly self-critical- like listening to your voice on an answering machine- but it means we all get the opportunity to listen to a message and/or leave one, so thanks & here's to more!